Stray Bullets: No Lucky Charms for One of Veronica's Gang?

I knew the janitor had something to do with it!

Well, okay, I didn't, but Veronica Mars doesn't often pointedly introduce a character in an episode just to have them fade back into the ether. Like, say, for example, Neptune High's tarnished golden boy, Lucky, who was last seen sweeping the halls of Veronica's school.

Since his first appearance, I've been wondering when we'd see Lucky--the Neptune Varsity player turned injured soldier turned high school janitor--again. And it ends up that he's not only stalking Gia Goodman, the daughter of decidedly crooked Mayor Woody Goodman, but he's also tangled up with Meg Manning's evangelical and abusive father... and quite possibly the bus crash mystery as well.

Which would be exciting in and of itself, but if the UPN promo department is to be believed, next week's episode appears to depict an armed Lucky terrorizing Neptune High. And it's quite possible that his rampage might very well have a victim. (Though, honestly, I hope not. This is Veronica Mars, not 24.) So who's going to bite the bullet then? Here's a handy list of Lucky's possible victims.

(1) Jackie

Using the logic of 1980s horror movies, Jackie is definitely a goner. She and Wallace had sex after the Alterna-Prom and this is a teen drama, after all, so she's either going to end up (A) dead, (B) pregnant, or (C) both. We already had a teen pregnancy this year (Duncan's ex-girlfriend Meg wound up carrying his baby), Jackie's been talking about attending the Sorbonne for college rather than stay locally, and I've finally started liking the girl, so I think creator Rob Thomas will make me feel forever guilty by killing Jackie just as she became sympathetic. RIP, Jackie Cook; we hardly knew ye.

(2) Gia

Lucky's been stalking Gia for a while now, so why not finish the job once and for all and off her. You know, one of those if he can't have her, no one will sort of things. But at the same time, his gripe seems to be less with the mayor's daughter and more with the Mayor himself. I don't think that his stalking was motivated by an obsession with Gia but rather a way to get at Woody Goodman through his family. So what's Lucky's gripe with the incorporation-fixated local mayor? Not sure, though Keith nearly got Lucky to open up in his holding cell. Either way, I'm thinking that Gia is a red herring; we're not all that emotionally connected to her, which would make her death rather... dramatically unsatisfying. Unlike, say...

(3) Mac

I will be totally honest here and say that I love Mac. Sure, that's been rather obvious from the way I've been pleading with Rob Thomas to make the actress that plays her (Tina Majorino) a full castmember, but the energy and spark that she brings to the episodes she's in is infectious. I know Veronica doesn't really get along well with other women (other than her poor dead best friend Lily Kane), but based on the adversarial relationships she's had with Neptune's ladies (deadbeat mom, Celeste Kane, Kendall Casablancas, Jackie, Madison, etc.), that's understandable. However, she and Mac have this great Buffy-and-Willow vibe and make a fantastic sleuthing team. All I can say is: please don't kill Mac! (Instead, make her Veronica's roomie next year at college!)

(4) Dick or Cassidy Casablancas

With the revelation that stepmom Kendall would inherit a fortune in insurance money if the Casablancas boys were to die, I'd say it's a pretty safe assumption that someone is gunning for them. Whether they end up collateral damage in Lucky's shooting spree is another matter, but I'd hate for either Casablancas--hilarious misogynist Dick or sensitive, secretive Cassidy--to be written out of the show. They've turned into such wonderful supporting players in Veronica's unfolding drama.

(5) Wallace

Highly unlikely that best bud Wallace will be the one to die, especially as they've already set up the fact that he'll be attending Hearst College in the fall... which is most likely (or--cough, cough--definitely) where Veronica will end up as well. And besides for occasional forays with Mac, he's Veronica's go-to mystery buddy and he always has her back. His chances of survival are looking pretty darn good, unless he does something foolish and dives in front of the gun to save his current girlfriend Jackie.

(6) Logan

Okay, I reeeeally doubt that Logan will get killed, but you never know. But I hope not, in any case. He and Veronica single-handedly have the best chemistry of any couple--or non-couple as the case may be--on any television show. When the two formerly lovers are in a scene together, the TV screen could seriously burst into flames and melt onto my living room floor. Logan's tied up in part of the ongoing mysteries--dad Aaron killed his girlfriend Lily Kane, Veronica's BFF--and he was framed for the murder of Felix by PCH'er Thumper and the notorious Fitzpatrick gang. Plus, he's sleeping with Kendall Casablancas again, and she's a prime suspect in the whole bus-crash mystery, and is secretly dating Liam Fitzpatrick... His death would mean the end of an era for Veronica Mars and would probably catapult Veronica over the deep end, considering she did just spill her feelings for him in this past episode. Like Wallace, I think he'll be around next season.

(7) Backup

No, I don't really think Veronica's lovable pooch is gonna get killed by Lucky, but his disappearance from the series is somewhat troubling. Do we need to put up missing dog posters on telephone poles around Neptune? We never see Backup laying around on Veronica's couch or chasing down would-be stalkers or murderous Fitzpatricks, so where'd he go?

What's On Tonight

8 pm: Ghost Whisperer (CBS); Deal or No Deal (NBC); Smallville (WB); Daytime Emmy Awards (ABC); Austin Powers in Goldmember (FOX; 8-10 pm); WWE Friday Night Smackdown (UPN)

9 pm: Close to Home (CBS); Las Vegas (NBC); Supernatural (WB)

10 pm: NUMB3RS (CBS); Conviction (NBC)

What I'll Be Watching

7:20 pm: High Spirits with Shirley Ghostman.

Watch Shirley channel dead famous people, aided by the spirit of his dead dog Sheba, in this hilarious and often painful spoof psychic show.

9 pm: Doctor Who.

On tonight's installment ("Father's Day"), the Doctor and Rose travel back in time, where Rose comes face to face with her dead father, but instead of sunshine and puppies, they find themselves battling the monstrous Reapers.